new-york-fashion-week

Another New York City Fashion Week has arrived upon us, and you know what means; parties! Sure, you can act interested in all the designer clothes being modeled that 95% of the population will never wear, or be able to scrounge up enough pennies to afford, but we all know where the real action lies. In the after-parties. These bashes are known for bringing out the celebrities, high profile names, and believe it or not, a lot of the times the everyday Sally and Joe can attend them if done right. Of course, as with any party, there are going to be creatures from all walks of life that attend, and these are the five that you are sure to encounter.

models

The models that only hang with other models. Sure, they may look good, and friendly, but good luck getting close to them. They don’t want to talk to your overly champagne drunk self, even if you are breaking down the chicken dance better than anyone else. Save your time, as they will most likely only be hanging out with other industry proclaimed “beautiful” bags of skin and bones.

The underage rich “IT” boy dressed to the hilt. This is the kid that has the parents that feed him gold flakes in his pancakes, and has never heard no for an answer. He will be clearly underage, evidenced by not being able to properly pop that $300 dollar bottle of champagne and proceeding to get too drunk and projectile vomit all over his un-tailored pleats. All while doing anything to get the attention on him.

The bloggers. This is the crew that has their phones out at all times, documenting every move without actually indulging in any of the fun. With the hunchbacks from constantly looking down and carpal tunnel on the wrists from all the typing, this herd of buzz-killers is one to avoid. They will flash their media pass in your face to let you know they belong.

The student in the handmade outfit. This is the local student wearing something so ridiculous because they want to be noticed for their originality. They need the attention more than that girl at the bar screaming “shots” and stamping her feet like a wildebeest. Their outfit was probably a culmination of 2 months of sewing, only to look like they belong in a refrigerator box behind the combination Chinese and Taco restaurant. But hey, that’s what they were going for right?

producer

Finally, that brings us to the producer of the show that will change outfits 10 times throughout the course of the party. They will make it known they are important, strictly through wardrobe. 8 out of 10 outfits are terrible, but that doesn’t make a difference. Watch closely for a personality change with each outfit. It’s as if Me, Myself, and Irene have thrown themselves into the martini infused mix.